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Conflict Resolution

The Secrets of Happily Married Men

Passion, Intimacy and Connection, February 2, 2006

Scott Haltzman unveils the differences between men and women and explains what works. He believes verbal communications is overvalued and shows how nonverbal communication can be equally important.

Scott Haltzman encourages an environment of understanding and appreciation where the unique strengths men possess can be incorporated into 8 proven techniques that build successful long-lasting relationships. He has been talking to men about their marriages for years and also includes unique thoughts posted at his website.

This is a book for men who want their marriage to last and it will empower any man who uses the 8 proven techniques. The research that led Scott Haltzman to write this book is based on real-life questions and answers.

This book was written for men, but may be enjoyed by women who want to increase the passion, intimacy and commitment level in their marriage. By understanding how men and women think, it could possibly open up a new level of communication and help couples feel more emotionally connected.

My husband is reading this book! :) Already I think
he understands me better.

~The Rebecca Review


Who's Pushing Your Buttons


5.0 out of 5 stars Hope in Troubled Times, December 23, 2008

"Who's Pushing Your Buttons" is one of the best books I've ever read on conflict resolution. This is a really useful book that helps you to take charge in very difficult situations. It is encouraging to know that your relationship with someone difficult is not completely hopeless.

Dr. John Townsend begins this book by presenting the reasons someone in your life is a button-pusher. The first chapter analyzes the problems you may be encountering or at least it explains the reasons people are button-pushers.

In a way, this book is as much about working on yourself as it is about getting another person to change. Most of the book deals with issues you can handle yourself, like getting a life vs. being obsessive about a troublesome relationship. As you work on yourself the situation can start to change. Simply by spending more time away from the problem it can get better. That is just the start of how to deal with problems. Dr. John Townsend has quite a few good solutions that involve setting boundaries and at times withdrawing from difficult people. This seemed to work well with relatives that were out of control.

Most of the advice in this book seems to work well within a marriage relationship. My husband and I take turns being each other's button pushers. He thinks I talk too much about certain subjects (I analyze a lot) and I think he talks too little about subjects important to me. So there are some topics we just have to avoid. That was something that wasn't addressed in the book - avoidance of dangerous topics that cause anger.

This book is much more in favor of taking the bull by the horns. For lasting change and a peaceful relationship sometimes you have to make difficult decisions that could cause a temporary loss of comfort. While this book doesn't advocate a total separation I think that might be useful in some relationships. The author believes there is hope for everyone but does believe you should get help if your relationship has turned violent.

So if you are in a relationship where someone is driving you crazy you might just have a button-pusher on your hands. According to this book, there is hope and you have more control over the situation than you realize. I can highly recommend this book to anyone struggling in an abusive relationship. The ideas in this book will help you with relatives, friends, work associates and marriage partners. It is great to know that you can turn any relationship around with God's help and a bit of wisdom and persistence.

I've found that reading relationship books and trying to practice unconditional love has been what keeps my marriage together. Each book I read gives me new ideas and I try to put them into practice as soon as possible. I have noticed that as I change myself and try to be a better person, my relationship with my husband and family is better. So I really agree with the author's ideas of working on yourself first so you can be a good example of how to live out the Christian life. I'm not perfect but thirteen years of marriage has made me a better person. So it is worth sticking it out during troubled times.

~The Rebecca Review




It is said that if you place cardamom under your tongue and kiss 
your husband/wife, he/she will be bound to you by invisible chains of desire.

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